It takes ONE time

These stories that I’m hearing or reading are heartbreaking. Ladies, we need to empower ourselves to know that we are worth more than the relationships we allow ourselves to be in. Being with a partner that verbally, physically or emotionally abuses you is NOT acceptable. I understand we make excuses for our partners and that’s what keeps us in these relationships but who are we truly hurting, them or ourselves… or worse, our children. Some of us don’t even realize how bad our situation is until it’s too late, like one story you will read below. Some of us feel that our partner will change or God will change them – what if that doesn’t happen then what?

I recently heard a story of a woman where her mate beat her; she didn’t leave but allowed herself to believe that God forgave him. I can’t judge if God did or didn’t but when it happens again, because it will, what excuse will you use to comfort yourself then. People that abuse people don’t wake up one day and stop; they have to go through a process either counseling, anger management, church…Etc. They have to realize and accept that what they are doing is wrong and WANT to change. Regardless of the method, there is a process that must take place. We automatically assume that they changed because they asked for forgiveness, promise that they will never do it again, cry, give flowers and are the sweetest person for a few days…. on the other hand we are so blind we don’t realize that’s just another part of the domestic violence cycle called the honeymoon phase. Trust me; I know we think FINALLY it won’t happen again. WRONG, the next thing that makes them snap all hell breaks loose and we are the punching bags again… this time the question is         WILL WE SURVIVE

Here is a story I read today – what breaks my heart is where she tweeted “Wouldn’t be so bad if he ain’t tried 3 times before, But I’m Gods Child ain’t never scared” – that’s the  same day he killed her. God can only do so much, he gives us the tools to make wise chooses. We can’t stand in front of a bus and not expect to get killed. I’m not in any way putting this young girl down or saying she deserved this by any means. My point is the God issue, it’s like the other story where she said God forgave her boyfriend, that’s great STILL don’t continue to stay in harm’s way to wait for God to have to forgive him again after another violent attack. We use God to make excuses for them did it ever occur that maybe God didn’t choose that person for us. Let’s think of it that way and allow ourselves to break free from these violent relationships.

If a guy can threaten to kill you TRUST that he probably will. Forget that he said it 100 times before, it takes him to SNAP ONE TIME and you’re done. Some make it out alive some don’t. Don’t take that chance, no relationship is worth it…                       RIP to another DV victim: Woman found murdered 2 days after calling 911 for help

~Donata Joseph

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